Ordinariness

In an interview in the current edition of CAM Magazine, the 12th Earl of Drogheda reveals that he didn't join a dramatic society at university. Now why would that be?

The conventional and anticipated reason (too shy) comes first:
"I think this was because of a mixture of insecurity..."
The second, and rather unexpected, one comes next:
"...and fear of not being given star roles."

Hold it. Fear? Of not being given star roles? That looks like an unusual fear. Even in a world where we discover new phobias daily. But it echoes my conviction that much shyness and holding back reflects not our discomfort at being the objection of attention per se, but our grandiosity: our fear that we won't be seen to be as clever, important, noteworthy, funny, beautiful as we think we really are - or could be.

It reflects our unspoken expectation that we should be not just good, but significantly better than anybody else.

So, we're embarrassed to speak in public because we would like to be not just good enough but the finest orator in the land.

I've suggested this to a couple of shy people. They got quite cross. So I think I'm onto something.

I was paralysed by shyness for years.

I see there's now a drug for it. Good-oh.